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Monday, June 22, 2009
yup, i officially finished season 2 today. it was pretty exciting and really scandelous. however, i enjoyed the adventurous love and the extravegant way of handling issues that we don't usually worry about. this lifestyle however, might really be too complicated for normal people to deal with.
been hanging out with friends that i haven't seen in years, it felt really nice just purely talking about old times and laughing at the things we used to do, past gossips that we didn't really talk about last time. looking back, all of us were quite cute (i can't really think of other words).
had a really long chat with eileen during leaders' retreat last week. shared with beh and tony too and i got quite frustrated with how certain things turned out in my life. i felt lost and deserted bout God pulled me back again. i knew i cannot hold for any longer and i really need someone to guide me and be accountable to spiritually. i was hoping for that person to be my leader but that night he was quite tired so i didn't get a chance to talk to him.
finally did something sporty with my sec sch friends. we went east coast park to cycle, then blade, then fly kite and ended off with frisbee. the weather was quite atrocious yet i was thankful cuz it could have been worse if it rained. i got back my undesirable singlet tan and i guess it'll take a couple more weeks before it disappears. went to ivena's place to watch movie to save money on dinner and other misc expenses if we were to chill elsewhere. my friends were running low on cash so ya. wanted to play mahjong or cards but everyone was distracted by restaurant city so yea.
on the way to her place, we were discussing whether is it right for a christian to date a non christian. this topic is ongoing for a very long time with the same conclusion everytime. i stood by my answer all the until i couldn't answer ivena's question. so what will happen if ur christian gf decided not to be a christian and fall away from God? am i going to break off with her? similarly, so what if the girl is not a christian? does that mean that she'll never be one?
somehow deep inside i know the answers for the questions above but i started to waver. a part of me is questioning me whether my stand for the past 6 yrs has been invalid all along. yet, at the same time the reason y i took my stand was because of my conviction with God. it is not just about me anymore, i have a cg to take care of and it is my responsibility to be that role model for them. its quite ironic actually, i dun hide stuff from them, i share whatever im going thru with them and its not always the right thing to do. they do tell me that they feel that im quite screwed up occasionally but i lived with it cuz thats who i am but i am willing to change. i can easily filter parts of my life that i am not proud of from them but i choose not to because i want them to share theirs as well. u can say that its a fair trade, i would prefer to use that term trust.
before i continue to drift off from what was discussed, perhaps i will list out my thoughts on this issue first. in the bible it says not to be unequally yoked with somebody. the term yoked referring to spiritual level. not only christians and non christians, but among christians, the level must be somewhat equal. with that in mind, i am fully aware that unless God gets me someone himself, i will be single for the rest of my life and that's unbearable. im not saying its not good to be single, i enjoyed life as it is now. alright, just lost my train of thoughts.
+++10:38 PM+++
Jesus is Love
yup, i officially finished season 2 today. it was pretty exciting and really scandelous. however, i enjoyed the adventurous love and the extravegant way of handling issues that we don't usually worry about. this lifestyle however, might really be too complicated for normal people to deal with.
been hanging out with friends that i haven't seen in years, it felt really nice just purely talking about old times and laughing at the things we used to do, past gossips that we didn't really talk about last time. looking back, all of us were quite cute (i can't really think of other words).
had a really long chat with eileen during leaders' retreat last week. shared with beh and tony too and i got quite frustrated with how certain things turned out in my life. i felt lost and deserted bout God pulled me back again. i knew i cannot hold for any longer and i really need someone to guide me and be accountable to spiritually. i was hoping for that person to be my leader but that night he was quite tired so i didn't get a chance to talk to him.
finally did something sporty with my sec sch friends. we went east coast park to cycle, then blade, then fly kite and ended off with frisbee. the weather was quite atrocious yet i was thankful cuz it could have been worse if it rained. i got back my undesirable singlet tan and i guess it'll take a couple more weeks before it disappears. went to ivena's place to watch movie to save money on dinner and other misc expenses if we were to chill elsewhere. my friends were running low on cash so ya. wanted to play mahjong or cards but everyone was distracted by restaurant city so yea.
on the way to her place, we were discussing whether is it right for a christian to date a non christian. this topic is ongoing for a very long time with the same conclusion everytime. i stood by my answer all the until i couldn't answer ivena's question. so what will happen if ur christian gf decided not to be a christian and fall away from God? am i going to break off with her? similarly, so what if the girl is not a christian? does that mean that she'll never be one?
somehow deep inside i know the answers for the questions above but i started to waver. a part of me is questioning me whether my stand for the past 6 yrs has been invalid all along. yet, at the same time the reason y i took my stand was because of my conviction with God. it is not just about me anymore, i have a cg to take care of and it is my responsibility to be that role model for them. its quite ironic actually, i dun hide stuff from them, i share whatever im going thru with them and its not always the right thing to do. they do tell me that they feel that im quite screwed up occasionally but i lived with it cuz thats who i am but i am willing to change. i can easily filter parts of my life that i am not proud of from them but i choose not to because i want them to share theirs as well. u can say that its a fair trade, i would prefer to use that term trust.
before i continue to drift off from what was discussed, perhaps i will list out my thoughts on this issue first. in the bible it says not to be unequally yoked with somebody. the term yoked referring to spiritual level. not only christians and non christians, but among christians, the level must be somewhat equal. with that in mind, i am fully aware that unless God gets me someone himself, i will be single for the rest of my life and that's unbearable. im not saying its not good to be single, i enjoyed life as it is now. alright, just lost my train of thoughts.
Jesus is Love