Teacher's Diary

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

hmm. its been really long since i last blogged at home. i wanted to swim in the afternoon but the weather was really bad. ended up playing maple for several hours. found a few rare items and ya, earned almost a million so now i have like 2.6 million. woo hoo. i gave amiel my account because he sort of gave up being a warrior and too lazy to train. decided to just use mine to show off to his friends. oh well.

sat morning, i went to eugene's house for followup as well as tuition. we had a good time chatting and sharing. i went off just before he had lunch with his sister. felt really sucky that day because my hair was quite messy and i was dressed shabbily. but that was only in the morning...

wanted to meet bryan and jeremy to swim but they had to go bishan to celebrate vinna's birthday. anyway, i was too lazy to go get lunch for myself so i asked bryan to help me da bao. while waiting for my lunch, i joined the worship team that day for practise. didn't do much la, at least i had someone to talk to. oh, the sound system in church was changed and it looked quite impressive, with every musicians having a earphone to listen to others.

tm was great as usual. we ended earlier because of the briefing of the ole outreach. i joined edwin for the ubin thingy and ya. in the midst of the filling forms and stuff, sarah saw this moth at the white board area. someone took it out and threw it behind. anyhow, i saw vinna and kris behind so decided to do something spastic. i left the dead moth in front of them and went back for the briefing. needless to say, both of them screamed. actually after doing that, i felt really stupid but nvm ah. can't turn back time. oh and ya, u can kinda expect wad joel will say. bullying his giant dunno wad fruit. hm, joel has a flair for coming up with stupid nickname for his GIRLS. from baobeis and numbers to giant fruits. who knows what wil be next?? heh

service training was right after the briefing. nothing much to say bout that. i didn't want to go home so early so intended to stay at someone's house again. its not that i got a problem with staying at home. from mon to fri, i work till 8pm before i could go home. when i got home, surf the net for 2 hrs then do QT then slp. i need to break free from that as in work had been pulling me down. i dreaded going there.. ALOT. that's y every sat and sunday, i prefer to go elsewhere apart from home.

oh ya, as i was saying, i went to chris' house first to get jeans from ivan cuz he wanted to go rouge (clubbing). not for drinking but rather to see some hip hop performance. while waiting for ivan to call me once his done at cityhall, i chat with chris about alot of things, it wasn't some mindless talk so ya, felt better after talking to him, at least he understands wad im going through.

rouge was weird. the music was surprising softer that what i had in mind. the place wasn't that smokey too. i thought that the music was alright, at least better than having lots of technos. ivan's friends were rather friendly and one of them i would say emotional. he got a big prob with malays which i thought was quite funny. must have had some bad experience with them before but still, not all malays are that bad rite?? in fact, a few of his friends are malays.. surprised that they weren't offended by him. anyway, that emotional guy (dunno his name.. lets call him X) is quite good with hip hop dancing. wanted to learn how to do certain steps but was quite conscious of how i behave there, mainly becausee that was my first time in a club. basically, while everyone was dancing, i just sat there and observe, trying to figure out certain dance steps. saw alot of lesbians and amongst them, several girls were rather hot. i felt as though i lost touch of like making friends with girls outside church. felt really ackward when i wanted to talk to one of them who sat somewhere near me,

on sunday, i went for second service. i still prefer first. went for a quick lunch, intended to swim but realised that i didn't have enough time to do so. went straight to st gabs after that. the teams were reshuffled and ya, i was with greg dan james joel chong ruru and becca. we rested for the first game and after that, it was chionging all the way. i was mainly the catcher or the defender. we won everything but the last match with wackos. actually i dun think my group is inferior to theirs. the difference between us and them was that we didn't ahve any substitutes. the first half was still okie, everyone still had some energy. by the second half, 3/4 of the team couldn't run anymore, thus we got thrashed quite badly. had a few compliments bout being a good catcher, was really happy that eventho i played a minor role, i still got acknowledged by my team. actually no matter where we go, as humans, we want to be known/ acknowledged. especially in a team, when we got that, our morale will be high and thus the productivity will increase as well. on the contrast, an insult will cause the team member to get disheartened and productivity will dropped. through this game, was able to renew certain friendships which was really good.

after the game, went home and slept for like half an hour on the sofa before my dad woke me up for dinner. had a nice chat at night until really late. haha.

mon went out with maria at toa patoh to do some shopping and after that, i went to chrystal's house to discuss some stuff. got home for like 1 hr plus. bryan called me at around 7 to go ps for dinner. invited ivan along and ya, 3 of us went shopping for vinna's present. throughout the whole trip, both bryan and i were like guessing ivan's response regarding certain things. started off with what he will order for dinner, then it was whether he want to add veggies. shan't say out the rest.

went home around 9 plus. bryan dragged to all the way to his house to take 76. was quite shagged after that. haha.

im going out to meet my friend soon. gelare rocks man. i have yet to exercise but i probably will do sit ups after i get back. or should i wait till i get into the army? haha. procrastination........

+++4:51 PM+++

Jesus is Love
Wednesday, August 24, 2005

first time in my life, i wanna run away from work, i wanna walk off, i don't care anymore. i feel helpless, i wanna bash up my boss, i'm angry. if u don't need extra help, don;t employ me then. have been working for almost 5 weeks already. instead of praising me for selling the most coms this month, u intend to take a portion of my already quite pathetic commission away? i didn't ask u for a pay rise, i didn't complain bout the low basic. why must u do that? im like getting less than 5 dollars an hour. i totally lost my respect for u.

trying not to play so much com but there's like nothing to do at home. frankly speaking, i prefer chatting online with people but everyone's like busy. been having alot of trouble with my com. its getting really laggy. hoping to get a new com for my birthday, think i will pay half of it, the other half by my parents. i have been working but my parents still continue to give me allowance. that's the only way that they will let me use the money i've earned.

lost my tan already. need to get it back, but im playing for worship this sat. hope that sunday have a good weather for tanning. oh ya, captain's ball. dang fun!! gonna have a 4 days break after that, before working for another 3 more. then it will be time to exercise and preparation to serve the nation. i love singapore!!

+++3:36 PM+++

Jesus is Love
Monday, August 22, 2005

just finished watching all the naruto episodes since this morning. it rocks man. i'm left with full metal panic and initial d animes. need zech to lend me some more so i will have something to do during office hours. feeling abit giddy now, decided not to continue with the rest of it. took off my specs, hoping that it will help. and yes, feeling hungry again!!

yesterday went for the captain ball competition after service and after slacking for one hour at the lan shop at ps. the weather was crappy. overall, it was fun. played one game only. i wasn't that active cuz my role doesn't require me to run much. in fact, i just stood there and jump when the ball comes. being a defender and a catcher is quite fun. heh. love slacking. my group won the game by 5-1 i think. it was quite a good game. the opposing players (some of them) were quite vulgar and rough to a certain extend, that was after joel (chong) offended them unintentionally. anyway, the catcher knocked my head and didn't apologise after that. haha. i looked back and smile, trying to tell her that im okay but apparently, she doesn't really care.

joel yong's team almost lost to the handicapped team. it was rather amusing looking at their opposing team winning the first half of the game. handicapped team referring to uncle teck chuan, auntie slyvia, auntie sue, uncle jeff, pastor william, pastor ken, uncle ben, uncle alick and so on. i was rather impressed with uncle ben (jem's father) and uncle alick. both of their stamina are quite remarkable for their age. they ran around the court for the entire game without having any rest. then during the 4 mins interval, pastor william suggested to start early cuz they don't need to rest. since they had no objections, joel and team shouldn't have as well, thus the match continued. auntie sue complained bout jon being too tall to defend and asked for a switch of defenders. another rule was added too, that jon wasn't allowed to jump when he's defending. it was quite funny la. don't think jon put in his best for that particular game. hard to anyway, facing all those adults. lol.

went to bryan's house after that. uncle albert drove me there, since alden's going there as well. we got off outside the condo and i decided to get some food before going up. after telling the auntie that i wanna da bao at the economic rice stall, alden sort of made me realised that we are suppose to have dinner. then i was made to like tell the auntie that i dun wanna order already. but then, i was really hungry, so we went on to the rojak stall, there wasn't any queue but the uncle told us to wait for 10 mins for the food. both of us were rather impatient so obviously waiting for 10mins was out of the question. once again, i thickened my face and rejected my order. since it was hard to get solid food, we went to the econ mini mart to get some snacks. when we got there, i suddenly remembered that bryan's house has some crackers. but since we dun wanna make another wasted trip, i got some chocolate sticks thingy. just like that, we spent 15 mins walking aimlessly around the neighbourhood.

swam after that, just the three of us. james came to look for us after that and somehow we managed to convince him to swim. after awhile, both alden and bryan got bored and decided to do something crappy, that is to strip me. it was fun but painful. i shouldn't wear fbts down, must change to berms or something. so dangerous. haha.

went to watch movie with alden and ivan after that. bewitched. another crappy movie. somehow, nicole kidman is involved in alot of lousy show. wads wrong with her? i wanna watch movies with jessica alba. woo hoo. she's hot hot hot. gonna ask her to teach me how to dance. ah haha. im going off soon. she's gonna call me and we are going to chat on the phone!! bleah

+++7:18 PM+++

Jesus is Love
Saturday, August 20, 2005

friday was rather extreme. in the morning, up till 2pm, the internet connection in the building was down. this means that no internet which was like everything to me. saw 2 acs(i) students loitering around the benQ shop which was just beside my shop. they looked rather nerdy and anyhow, since i got nothing to do, i decided to take a walk outside. then, i saw another bunch of acs guys at the posb office, one of which was eliel. i thought he would behave differently as from church, crappy as ever. hah.

called him on the phone and ya, came to look for me after that. simply waved and walked off for lunch i think. anyway, after the connection was up, i immediately downloaded the divx player on the media played which is connected to the 42 inch plasma tv and after that, i watched mnaruto all the way until 6pm. boss decided that since there's no customers, we were called upstairs to work. anyhow, i spotted a com at the corner of the shop with maple. decided to log in and ya, started playing until 8pm, which was time to go home. now work seems more fun!!

that night was rather strange. i had some strange dreams which continued on even though i woke up like three times. in my dream, i saw chris eliel daniel and shukun. the funny thing bout this dream is that both chris and eliel were falling in love with someone. i shan't mentioned names here. i like the part when eliel gave a speech to court his girl. he sounded so mature. at that point of time, i was really proud of him. as in really, i felt that he really grow up and was ready to be a real man. at the same time, i felt quite wasted. too bad i dun have a sister. if not i would highly recommend her to him (that is if they were around the same age). as for chris, i was super worried because that girl ain't that decent (no offense.. really.. its just a dream, my dream). now let me continue. i discovered some of her plans to cheat chris off his feelings. for what reasons, im not very sure. anyway, the next 2 parts of the dreams wasn't that nice. it was about rescueing chris from the clutches of the witch. chris, blinded by love, refused to listen to me. i interfere quite abit until we (chris and i) fought. and ya, i woke up after that. the deepest impression for that dream was still eliel and the way he talked and treated his soon to be girlfriend, who doesn't exist in reality. she's a sister of somebody but that person doesn't have a younger sis. oh well, i dun think she looked that great. eliel definitely deserves someone better, but that's for later. yup.

felt rather crappy the whole day because of that dream. went to yf early, just wanted to spend time with people. God sort of hinted me not to play so much MS as its taking away some important part of my life - my guess is friends la. actually i know exactly who God is referring to and ya, im trying my best to get back on track with God, similarly to my friends.

oh yes, i think today's sermon was awesome. simple truths, but yet provoking in thought. i never thought such a simple passage will have so many hidden truths in it. heh. after sermon, we were suppose to go to our discussion rooms rite? my cg's is at third floor, so we alwauys use the staircase at the back. walked there with nick but he decided to walk one big round, so i hid behind the staircase and as he approached me, i jumped out and scared him. he was stunned for quite some time la. anyway, he wanted to get back at me by doing the same thing to others. i told him to hide behind the staircase and wait for my signal to jump. just then, i heard some footsteps, so i presume its zech and dan, so i gave him the signal. immediately, after he jumped out and screamed at the same time, someone freaked out and jumped at the same time, but it wasn't daniel or zech, but the indian workers from church. i tell u, nicholas was so embarrassed and i was engaged in laughter.

during discussion, we were discussion bout the significance of the mountains found in mark v23. for some unknown reasons, nick will suddenly burst out laughing. when we asked him, he was like "sorry ah, everytime i think of the incident just now i will laugh." it happens quite a few times during cg. quite amusing. i tell u, seeing nicholas' reaction is priceless. im glad he's in my cg. haha

after yf, intended to go isabelle's house for the surprise party. somehow, i got left behind. felt kinda shitty after that, i know i could have gone there alone but looking at the crowd that's going joel's house, i decided to just go his house la. i mean we have been friends for such a long time already, same school and cca for 2 years. he was the one who bothered to talk to me when i felt left out during cf days. i really appreciated that and ya, i guess its payback time. i believe that the 21st birthday is something that is very big to him and being his friend, the least i could do is to give him support.

the buffet was really nice. i ate like 4 plates full of stuff. the best dish there was the octopus sushi thingy. it rocks man!! ate only 2 because there were limited numbers of it and ya. its good to be a blessing to others by sharing. oh well, it ended well. i had fun, and im sure he had fun too. feels good to have people driving me home. thanks ben! feeling love and at the same time, neglected. goodnite people. thinking too much is bad for the brain.

+++11:12 PM+++

Jesus is Love
Thursday, August 18, 2005

i like white colour. for some reason, it makes me special. next time u see me wearing white, there can only be 2 possible reasons. i am in a very good mood, or that i dun have clothes left to wear. actually there's more..
i borrowed it from friends, i can't be bothered to choose.. haha. so there's 4 reasons. not bad eh.

saw a father whacking his child on the train today. felt kinda uneasy after that. he was asking his son to keep quiet but the son (lets name him Tom) continuously bugged his dad to get off the train. tom is a delinquent so ya. anyway, dad (let's name him Dick for fun) totally ignored him for a couple of minutes until he finally blew up. dick took out weapon, the double axe medicated oil and applied it on the side of tom's nostrils. that is quite a sensitive area, applying oil there will have a stinging effect. tom just glared at dick and kept quiet for a few seconds before asking dick the same question again, that is to get off the train. dick flared up and started smacking tom's hand. tom felt quite helpless and resorted to knocking his head on the seat. everytime tom does that, dick will smack him. so it was like a continuous cycle. my mum was beside me, she told me not to look. how could i not? they were making so much noise. as much as i wanted to look away, i ended up staring at them again. such a traumatic experience, painful! thankfully, i got off soon after. heard from my mum that the hitting got worse after i got off. her mood got affected by this too. haha. lousy morning, hoping that it will be better later on in the afternoon.

today the primary 6es having their PSLE oral exams. my boss' youngest son came to the office. he's playing MS upstairs. OMIGOSH!! i'm so tempted to go up and play. the wireless connection is stronger so ya, impossible to play it at my office. boo hoo hoo.

+++11:35 AM+++

Jesus is Love
Wednesday, August 17, 2005

i missed wearing my school uniform, would it be the same if i were to go jc instead of poly? i never like wearing home clothes to school, uniform looks alot smarter and heh, girls look cuter in that too. i missed those days in cjc!

i regretted:
1) not wearing a bigger shirt. when i first bought it, it was okie. gradually it shrunk. not that nice looking once it gets tight.

2) not getting to know more people. i could have extended my social circle to the school instead of just my cca.

3) not spiking my hair. it was already trendy, but i was more comfortable with the cool look rather than the sporty look.

4) not exercising before getting into cj. nicer to look at, easier to create a topic with girls.

5) not studying for O levels. i could have gotten into JC and enjoy the life there. poly friends are weird. as in i can't really connect with them after awhile. tried, but failed.

6) not daring enough. could have dated more girls. haha. at least i have people to go out with during poly days.

having said all, i guess its just a period of desperation for girls once again. this is quite retarded la. i am trying to wait till my NS ends. 2 more years, thats it! find a girl friend, settle down, get married, have 3 children, educated them, retire, go for another honeymoon with my wife, died. how exciting!! by then, hopefully i can find ma love...

these words shouldn't come out from someone who is 17 and below. bear that in mind! u all are not ready yet. 17 because when u go jc, that will be the first time u get in touch with classmates of the opposite sex for most of us. there will be alot of sparks flying around, shooting through the roofs. u will be experiencing alot of unnecessary love and breakups. dun try!! its dumb...

+++3:41 PM+++

Jesus is Love
Tuesday, August 16, 2005

whoo hoo!! i have conquered boredom. sigh! this is not working man. i am so bored of doing nothing during work. i need a life, seriously!! thankfully, 2 more weeks and im outta here. oh, sorry bout the ranting on my previous post. well, that's life. can't expect everyday to be sunny, no?

national day's over, that means ivan will be free on saturdays now. welcome back buddy! back to chionging on weekends again, hopefully.

last friday, went for dinner at jack's place after work. regretted telling my mum that cuz she warned me not to eat beef. such a waste!! oh cuz she's a buddist and she expects me to at least respect her, or something along that line la. anyway, as long as she doesn't say i can't, i take it that i can. just for this dinner, i shall listen to her. dinner that day was quite different, the guy who vanished from the face of the earth came back to join us for the very first time this year. was quite glad to see him, afterall, he's part of D6.

the waiter who served us that day was quite clumsy. while pouring watermelon juice for us, he got it all over his shoes. i flipped through the menu and decided on fish and chips. quite disappointing but nvm la. the serving was very little. its a good thing that ivena don't like the corn and potato while wq hated the french beans. all was contributed to the leong's plate. heh

after dinner, i went to meet ivan. my friends went on for dessert, something that i think i can't afford. recently, alot of people came up to me and complimented on my BELLY!! arhhh.. what the heck. oh well, its been a LOOOONNGG time since i last exercise, or rather do sit ups. i guess i will start on the 11th sept, when all holidays end. for now, i shall enjoy the life of being fat.

we travelled all the way from douby ghaut to serangoon. actually that's not very far, but the fact that i was very tired that day, plus ivan being LATE for 15mins contributed to the time lag and made the 12mins train ride seemed forever. actually not so la, we chatted all the way, like always. having been taking NEL for so long, i can still get out of the station from the wrong exit. sigh, becoming more girl-like, directionless.

the stayover was quite different. for once, i was the first to fall asleep and u know what, it was before or perhaps at 12am.

sat morning, went to bryan's house to swim. ivan didn't follow cuz he wanted to go home first. the weather was splendid. tanning was my top priority. after like 1 hr or so, bryan got sian of tanning so he dragged me to swim with me. is not that i can't refuse him, he kept on ka cheowing me and splashing water on me. tanning without peace is equivalent to not tanning at all. oh, when we were swimming, bryan's neighbour came. he got a nice bod but he's a white chicken. heh. sat on the tanning bench with the soles together and tucked in. looked really funny. after awhile, he changed his posture to the giving birth pose. haha. there was another guy there. he wore a blue berms and carried a book, sat by the pool and read. white and nerdy. sigh! must be badly corrupted by the singapore education system. these people got no life.

yf was normal. actually i can't remember what happened. oh ya, sat beside seth and joshua. think seth is rather comical. like to talk to him alot, its really entertaining.

after yf, went for cgl meeting and then to bryan's house for bbq. on the way there, ivan was seriously stoning. as in S T O N I N G!! he looked like he got KO-ed, gone. there wasn't much food left when we got there (speaking of which, im feeling quite hungry now). i finished up all the left over squids and otah. they were good but spicy. so hot that it burns. it was like arhHHHH, HOT hOT HOT!! and next time u take spicy stuff, never mixed it with gas-sy drinks. no help at all.

went to the playground with pong to slack. later on, more people came. wanted to disturb penguin and her sister but the girls seen through our plans. went to ivan's house for sleepover after that since i still had spare clothes. i expected us to sleep quite early, but ended up talking until quite late.

sunday service was quite cool. thought i would sleep through service but i didn't. saw eliel dozing off though. haha. he's like really busy with school work. so much stress in school. poor thing. went to play lan after that. wanted to go beach but somehow all decided to pang sey.

lan was quite fun. my team won all the games, not because of me obviously. somehow i feel that vengenceful spirit is still my best character. oh and jon is really good at DOTA. haha. he's like OWNING!! felt like i was the lousiest there. haha.

saw my bus left when we reached the bustop but ended up the first to got on the bus. i was quite reluctant to board the bus, very much wanted to stay there and chat. its quite dumb la, cuz i dun like to go home so early. heh. two stayovers one shot. rocks man.

+++6:33 PM+++

Jesus is Love
Monday, August 15, 2005

i am feeling kinda unstable right now, filled with mixed emotions. just this morning, received a phonecall from one of my customer. she blamed me for not telling her that the computer don't have a floddy drive installed and that i didn't give her microsoft office professional. firstly, i showed her the exact model that she bought. secondly, i reconfirmed her order and asked her once more whether did i leave anything out. upon agreement on that, she paid the full amount. that call that i received doesn't really make sense at all! anyhow, she demanded a refund and i'm like whatever la.

no mood to blog bout my weekends. at least not now. the feeling is not right and im not going to scold anyone or whatever here. bye.

+++4:18 PM+++

Jesus is Love
Thursday, August 11, 2005

i am feeling kinda shitty now because the long that i have been typing for the past hour is gone because the stupid network got cut off just before i press the freaking 'publish post'. oh well, i have like 3.5 hrs left before i knock off from work so i might as well retype it all over AGAIN.

mon wanted to stayover at whoever's house but somehow no one was free. actually i didn't bother asking except for one. haha. come to think of it, its good that i could i catch up on some sleep eventhough there's no such thing as make up sleep. the more u sleep, the more tired u are, so y bother. i have a pimple of my face! *pokes*

tue was pretty much exciting because there's gonna be another stayover at chris' house. i'm glad that amidst of all the exams and tests, chris initiated this idea. as usual, eliel was the determining factor and daniel will be the last to confirm. we very much wanted to include shukun, but according the chris, he had something on that day.

i was in a rather good mood until my com became too lag to play MS. i exit the game and went on to upload the cg outreach photos instead. kept myself occupied till 3pm, that's when daniel called to meet up earlier. i exercised for 15 mins just before going out,due to the many comments made by people recently.

waited for daniel for around 15 mins at the bustop. it didn't seemed that long as there was a soccer match going on at the field just behind me. there was alot of screw ups as well nice shots. daniel came soon after. i thought he take up to dress up since he went out to celebrate his friend's birthday. was quite take aback when he got off the bus in t shirt and shorts once again. i should have guessed..

chris was still having tuition when we arrived. didn't want to distract him, so we got daniel to open the gate for us. the first thing i wanted to do was to visit his new dog - yoda. that's not much of a choice if they want to have a name from starwars. the female in that show are somewhat freaks from outerspace. it took me some time to come into contact with yoda. loke made the first move. naturally, when yoda was let out of the cake, she went after loke and tried to bite him or something along that line. after about 15 mins, i got myself sitting in front of the com and started playing MS while the 2 daniels continued playing with yoda.

chris came to look for us immediately after his tuition finishes. he played pool with daniel and had chilli water as stake (as usual). i didn't socialise with them because of some obvious reasons, or more like reason with the 's'. stopped playing when eliel came. the server required some servicing so ya, although i already intended to do that. heh

after losing like all his games, loke decided to give up and move on to another source of entertainment. that's when i remembered what dan (chia) told me to check out on his com. there was this game (dunno the title),somewhat similar to cs but instead of using gun, it has shaft and scissors as a secondary weapon. the primary weapon is a mini gun in between the groins. peeing was approximately 100 times stronger in the game, especially in the enhanced version. got quite sick after awhile, and since dan (chia) finished his tuition already, we went for dinner at bishan.

all of us ordered ribs except for dan who ordered chicken cutlet. the first dish that came out was the ribs. we sort of like asked chris to start eating first, mainly because he's the slowest eater among us. according to him, he's not slow. he savors every single bite of his meal. anyhow, he refused the offer and as the plate passed around, it landed on my table and since i was dying of hunger, i took it. got loke to say grace in thai. he asked god to bless the food but skipped the part on blessing the chef. when he told us the reason (which was that blessing the chef is kinda unnecessary), chris told him that their food wasn't there yet then dan was like SHUCKS!

as usual, my share was the biggest and chris' the smallest. it was quite amusing how chris reacted. too bad i couldn't get it on tape. we didn't talk much during dinner except for suaning chris. eventhough he got the smallest portion, gave some ribs to his brother even before he started eating. i was truly impressed.

dinner ended quite late. by the time we got back and finished watching this movie call 'jackass', it was past midnight already. one by one we went to bathe and ya, slacked around, doing nothing. oh, jackass is quite a sadistic show. guys whacking one another, doing retarded things that is beyond imagination. shan't elaborate any further. its not worth watching... reallly!

chris went to study after that and as for the rest of us, it was own time own target. i went to the basement to play pool with eliel while dan continue reading his storybook.

at the basement, everything was quite okie until i spotted a cockroach, sleeping on the wall. i assumed that its sleeping because it didn't move an inch for the next 2 hrs or so. after playing 2 rounds and winning both, i decided to put away our cue sticks and used our hands instead to play pool. instead of poking, u used flicking. eliel was so much better in that than me. ahah. throughout the 4 games, i tried to devise ways to kill that damn creature on the wall but decided to spare it at the end of the day. not that im merciful, but rather i scared i will dirty the wall. slept not long after that.

the next day, woke up around 7am because chris had tuition. went to the basement to continue MSing after a bathe. oh ya, went to disturb dan (chia) before going down. it took us less than a second to get him up. like what i did to most people, i used a piece of tissue paper to tickle his ear. it always work. heh.

went to play with Yoda after that until i needed to go to work. sigh. its suc a drag especially so after a stayover. oh well, thankfully i managed to stay awake.

+++4:32 PM+++

Jesus is Love
Monday, August 08, 2005

last week had been pretty cool and exciting. a little lack of sleep in exchange for so much stuff, its really worth it! friday, met daniel nana and amy at paya lebar to shop for bbq food. all the stuff we bought amounted to over $80 bucks. with amy around, u will never get the chance to take a bus. not complaining tho.

after shopping, we went to amy's house to marinate the chicken wings. soaked all the wings in the basin filled with water for it to defrost. while waiting, i chatted with dan while nana with amy. dunno what the girls were talking about but i reckoned that it'll better not knowing what they were talking bout. anyway, had a decent chat with dan too.

the chickens were soon ready to be marinated. it will rather funny looking at how daniel did it. he was stirring the chicken rather than mixing it. every 2 rounds, at least one wings will dropped out of the bowl. well, at least he did something. i took photos and apart from photos, there was nothing left, so i ate the fruits. providing more space for them to work.

after marinating, we sat down and ate the sara lee chocolate cake with vanilla ice cream. i tried to convince them to buy chocolate icecream but they refused. girls are so square. chocolate cake can also go with chocolate ice cream wad. oh haha. no wonder they like sponge bob. i didn't really enjoy the cake cuz of the butter smell, the smell used to be less strong. oh well..

amy started sharing some ghost stories before we went home. it was quite sucky, dun like to hear such stuff. fear for something that cannot harm u. those invinsible creatures, whats wrong with them. someone should educate them- behave like casper. oh, that night i took the stairs home, so as to burn off the fats from the chocolate cake. actually not la, scared will get stuck in the lift especially at night. no one will be able to help u even if i ring the alarm. the neighbours will think that its false alarm again. it happens that way most of the time.

on sat, i woke up at 6.30 am but get off my bed at only 7.05am. i sort of guessed that amy will be late so might as well like have another half an hour of sleep. we only got there by 7.45am. this was my first time in the wet market. the stench was unbearable. i held my breath all the way. after buying the seafood, we bought our 7kg watermelon. afterwhich, we went for breakfast then amy's house to peel prawns. got pricked by the dead thing a couple of times before i learnt the correct way of peeling. must not do it one compartment at a time, just use a bit of force and ripped the whole thing out. i was quite amazed by the tiny bit of flesh at the tail. didn't know that they had meat there.

we didn't study very much during the 4 hrs because there were only 3 people present namely amy ailin and I. the rest of them were late or had things on. anyhow, packed up earlier to swim at christina's house. we borrowed two balls from church and played in the pool. dunno how our topics drifted to miss silicon and something else. then as i were holding one out of the 2 balls, both christina and amy were like, "ahhh. uni boob". ailin has skin allergy so she couldn't get into the pool, which was quite a waste. the weather at that time was somewhat perfect for tanning. the blazing sun with cooling wind. nicholas suddenly had kelvin allergy and started throwing the ball at me for fun. dan likewise, had his own problems too. within like a few hours, he had cramps on different area.

swam till the sun was no longer in sight, or rather it was getting cold. i went to buy charcoal with nicholas. as i was unfamiliar with the place, led him through one round of the neighbourhood when we could have taken a shortcut. i discovered it only on the way back. when we got back, it was time to collect the fried rice. when we returned, we realised that we didn't have ice or containers, thankfully zech hasn't arrived yet so we told him to get ice for us. as for the container, christina and friend volunteered to get it from church. we got cheated by the auntie and uncle who sold the fire starters to us. both told us that it would be MORE than enough for usage by 15 pple. but NOOOOOO, we had to borrow charcoal from others.

during the whole bbq, it was crazy. my phone kept ranging because SOMEONE lost his way around church. we had an abundance of food. it took us like 1 hr before we realised that we had too much. i tried my best to eat tho. the sambal prawns and stingray rocked!! chicken wings were nice but troublesome. had to wash our hands continuously. played with the charcoal, drew our faces with it. i taught Mark (dan's friend) some lame songs. it was quite funny la, especially when he tried to imitate exactly what i did. im glad all of them had fun.

i had tonnes of fun too. im glad i have such a sporting cg. i hope in the midst of all the fellowship, deeper trust and friendships will emerged and that accountability will be present. these two factors will enable easy sharing and better communication. i want everyone to trust in the leaders as well the each individual cg members. we are there to help and encourage, we are there to share ur problems and if possible, solve it for u. we are there to listen and if possible, be there for u. all this are not possible if u dun trust us and refuse to open to us.

when i say accountability, there are two parts to it, private life and spiritual health. spiritual health should be self explainatory. as for private life, it is everything that is not spiritual. for eg, studies, friends, BGR, family etc. the leaders are here for a reason, and the reason is u (extracted from hoobastank). we want to be part of ur life and hope that u will be a part of our life as well. we have been through most of the things that u have been through before and certain things, we don't want u to fall into the trap like we did earlier on. bottom line is this, when we ask, its not because we are kpo,but rather we care. when we don't ask, it doesn't mean that we don't care, but rather waiting for u to tell us. it'll be better for u to tell us rather than we find out certain things ourselves. it hurts.

+++2:24 PM+++

Jesus is Love
Friday, August 05, 2005

feeling kinda low lately because of my sales during work. last week was still okie, at least i was able to achieve like slightly more than $5 an hour. this week however, for 3 days, i sold only one com. when i got home, i prayed. at times such as this, i am super desperate. getting underpaid wasn't something that will ever crossed my mind. this is a matter of pride i guess. God showed me the book of judges, on gideon. at first i didn't know what He was trying to tell me, not so until thursday morning, after i sold 4 coms, then he told me.. have faith my child. i could hear his voice ringing softly in my mind, ever so clearly. it was such a nice feeling. in fact, it was more than just feelings. once again, its a confirmation of God's grace in my life. time and time again, i failed to live up to his expectations but yet as long as i'm willing to come back, i can be sure that he will be there waiting for me with open arms.

2nd miracle happened today. it started yesterday when i was trying to look for my digi cam. anyhow, couldn't find it and my parents assumed that i must have lost in somewhere outside. this morning while i was having my breakfast, i prayed and God showed me a picture of where the cam was. and ya, in accordance with the vision i had, my dad found the cam. whee.. with God around, nothing is impossible - we just have to pray. :)

had 2 dreams yesterday nite. the first one was super cool and funny at the same time. i was involved in a stage performance - hip hop dance. i recalled that my team consists of guys and girls but after a few dance move, they cleared the stage and allowed me to have a solo performance, doing the 360 degree spin and other cool stuff that i wanted to learn some time ago. cheering and thunderous applause was indeed deafening! i felt really good, in fact, i think i was smiling in reality while having this dream.

the second part of the dream involved eliel. he happened to be in the same school as me, but wasn;t the same team as i am. he too had a hip hop performance, which is immediately after my group. the same thing happened to him as it happened to me. he had a solo too! instead of doing the spins, he did the robotic moves. something new and really impressive (but he can afford to smile more). throughout the performance, he was frowning. his movements were really slick and reached the stage of perfection. after he's done with the performance, i got up! nice dream. heh

can't remember my second dream.

+++1:35 PM+++

Jesus is Love
Thursday, August 04, 2005

my perfect plan had been ruined by one guy. initially, i wanted to watch Naruto from episode 100 to 145. my friend from next door promised to bring his hard drive so i can store it in my com which has like 360 GB space. together with the 40 over inch plasma screen and surround system, it could last me for one entire week. but noOoOoO.. he left the hard drive with his friend. now i am so bored that i downloaded games from www.download.com and finished off the trial version with all 2 laptops and 2 desktops.

all the games had been cleared. i managed to beat all the previous high scores and now i am like left with nothing. thankfully, there's still internet which allows me to download even more stuff to play. too bad the connection here is slow and irregular, if not i would just dl maplestory and play. that would really be heaven. if that's the case, i dun mind getting paid for like $3 an hr because im not even working. they will be paying me for the free internet, aircon and lunch. can u imagine using a 40 over inch plasma screen to play game. WOW!!

i should stop dreaming and ya, start working. oh ya, just before i reached funan today, saw one mother bringing her daughter out for shopping. the girl looked really sweet until she raised her right hand and started digging her nose. at the end of the whole excavation process, she actually admired the gold that she dug. being loaded with it, she decided to flick it somewhere along the road. thankfully no one was hurt. the streets are no longer safe until all gold diggers are exterminated!!

+++2:47 PM+++

Jesus is Love
Monday, August 01, 2005

i've just realised how much sleep i need everyday - its a frigging 9 hrs. without that amount of sleep, pimples will start evading my beautiful face and i will feel lathargic for the whole day. heh. i sounded quite gay. lol

had been reading da vinci code for the past week. it was quite captivating. i became disgusted when i reached the part when the Holy grail is actually mary madelene (however u spell that) and that she's Jesus' wife. what a load of crap. eventhough its a storybook, i find it quite disturbing. oh well.

yesterday's commission service was great. i felt very refreshing worshipping God at a bigger place, somewhat like a concert, yet the whole is filled with familar faces. uncle tim shared bout having only one master in our life. the choice that we made should be pretty obvious but did we allow any other masters to fill up our hearts as well? it may not be studies, money, maybe something more common. how bout friends? friends take up a big part of our lives. we spent most of our time with them. going out, stayovers and stuff, especially stayovers. often enough, we neglect our daily QT just because of that. if we know that we won't be able to do QT at his/her place, do we bother to do it before we go there?

i like having one to one time with people. it allows us to open up and share. sharing with people works like magic. it increases the trust between people and also enable our friends to walk nearer to our hearts. of course, there will be risk as chances are that we will get hurt deeper. casting that thought aside, believing more in our friends can be rather tough. every individual is created with a self defense mechanism. we were born with the ability to protect ourselves gradually as we grow up. in order for people to penetrate through the invinsible wall, we have to be willing to get hurt - its part of growing up. i heard from someone that if our lives are always smooth sailing, pray for trials as it will be healthier for us. to be like christ, we must learn to suffer too, that is with joy. let me share with u the advantage of trusting people.

1) u become more approachable. who doesn't like people who are trusting. being gullible is a different thing altogether.
2) life become simpler for u. u dun believe in rumors because u trust ur friends more than the words flying around.
3)u become more loving over time. love is build upon trust.

talking bout love for friends, i recalled the book of samuel in the bible. king saul of israel had disobeyed God and not repented. so Godchose david to be the next king. in addition, david's reputation among the people as a soldier was even surpassing saul's. so saul began to hate david and soon tried to kill him. but jonathan (saul's son) and david had grown to love one another deeply. what was jon to do, faced with loyalty to his father (the king who disobeyed god), on one hand, and his concern for david (the man who loved god) on the other?

jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself. jon took off his robe he was wearing and gave it to david, along with his tunic, and even his sword, his bow and his belt. jon was very fond of david and waened him, "my father saul is looking for a chance to kill u. be on your guard tml morning; go into hiding and stay there. i will go out and stand with my father in the field where u are. i'll speak to him about u and will tell u what i find out." (1 sam 8:3-4 ; 19:1-3).

jon loved david. his covenant was not just warm words. jon put love into action. eventho david was to dispalce jon as a successor to the throne, jon was more committed to david than his own success. we see no rivalry, no jealousy here. instead, we see jon giving part of himself (clothes and armor) and making every attempt to speak well of him, protect him, and try to change his father's mind about david. jon was well aware of david's needs, and he acted to meet them.

most of us woud like to have someone as committed to us as jon was to david. we desire close loving fellowship, but we aren't sure we want to make such a deep commitment to other people. what do u what ur clique or friends to be like? what attitudes and actions do u want to characterise u? are u willing to take steps to help that happen? to a certain extend, i find this scripture quite gay, but i realised that the words spoken from jon is actually very pure and simple. especially in terms of being a christian, we are talking bout LOVE. as a christian, we are suppose to be a loving community. love language is something that most people find it hard to established. making a comment seems alot easier than complimenting someone. simple gestures like a simple hug might be misunderstood as gay. the society has corrupted the defination of pure friendship and came up with a code of behavior. somehow it this is parallel to the pharisees. they came up with alot of elaborated laws from the instructions given by god.

we were meant to live a simple life. adam was allowed to eat the fruits from any tree except for one. things would be alot simpler if we obey god. our identity is in christ, not in people. we can do what we want as long as we obey and honor God in the things that we do.

+++11:40 AM+++

Jesus is Love