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Sunday, May 24, 2009
my friend asked me. what do u think gonna happen when u have a girlfriend. i thought for a really long time, people usually start off by defining the reasons for why u need one in the first place. i will try to answer the questions here, going to be completely honest with myself so try not to throw anything at me if i answered wrongly. at the very least, try to correct me.
for one, companionship. i guess being in a relationship is about committing to spend time getting to know each other, enjoy being together and to develop trust and build up on communication, both verbal and non verbal.
the next important aspect is an investment to love and be loved. a close friend that u can hold on to and enjoy intimate moments with. however, physical contact should be restricted as in a line should be drawn so as not to cross unintended boundaries. was trying to compare this with a close friend. somehow at this point of time, i feel that having close friend will still yield a higher return cuz there's less risk and i believe, close friends at this point in your life is far more lasting and eternal than ur bf/gf.
i define courtship as a phase whereby a couple try to get to know one another, while having the intention of getting married. during this phase, there are still alot of uncertainties. if handled carelessly, it might result in the end of a friendship. that's the main difference between a relationship and a friendship.
after going thru all these reasoning, i guess having a girl friend do require alot of your time. however, u can control how u spend ur time and with good organisational skills, life will be great. of cuz, primary concern will be to balance up gf and friends. needless to say, priority will go to family and church ministry. when out with friends, even when girl friend's around, friends will come first. when out with gf, i will probably put my phone on silent and not use it unless she's not with me (toilet or something).
then, another question came to my mind. lets say my guy friend decides to stay over and my gf is around, how do i deal with it? as much as possible, i will hope that my gf will understand and let us have some boys talk. if not, if she decides to stay, i will probably still slp with my friend. rationale being, no doubt that gf is important, but my guy friends dun usually stayover and i obviously will spend more time with gf. choosing friends over gf for that scenario doesn't equate to friends being more important than her; that doesn't also say that friends are less important than her. to me i guess friends and gf are of equal weightage. to be completely honest, i cannot share everything with my girlfriend. its a completely different story with a wife obviously.
im really blessed to have awesome friends who showered me with enough love that kept me going through my singlehood. somehow things changed over time, friends got busy during holidays. now im left alone, hoping for some love. NOT!! single life's not that bad, till i get a girlfriend, i shall enjoy my freedom. yay
+++11:56 PM+++
Jesus is Love
my friend asked me. what do u think gonna happen when u have a girlfriend. i thought for a really long time, people usually start off by defining the reasons for why u need one in the first place. i will try to answer the questions here, going to be completely honest with myself so try not to throw anything at me if i answered wrongly. at the very least, try to correct me.
for one, companionship. i guess being in a relationship is about committing to spend time getting to know each other, enjoy being together and to develop trust and build up on communication, both verbal and non verbal.
the next important aspect is an investment to love and be loved. a close friend that u can hold on to and enjoy intimate moments with. however, physical contact should be restricted as in a line should be drawn so as not to cross unintended boundaries. was trying to compare this with a close friend. somehow at this point of time, i feel that having close friend will still yield a higher return cuz there's less risk and i believe, close friends at this point in your life is far more lasting and eternal than ur bf/gf.
i define courtship as a phase whereby a couple try to get to know one another, while having the intention of getting married. during this phase, there are still alot of uncertainties. if handled carelessly, it might result in the end of a friendship. that's the main difference between a relationship and a friendship.
after going thru all these reasoning, i guess having a girl friend do require alot of your time. however, u can control how u spend ur time and with good organisational skills, life will be great. of cuz, primary concern will be to balance up gf and friends. needless to say, priority will go to family and church ministry. when out with friends, even when girl friend's around, friends will come first. when out with gf, i will probably put my phone on silent and not use it unless she's not with me (toilet or something).
then, another question came to my mind. lets say my guy friend decides to stay over and my gf is around, how do i deal with it? as much as possible, i will hope that my gf will understand and let us have some boys talk. if not, if she decides to stay, i will probably still slp with my friend. rationale being, no doubt that gf is important, but my guy friends dun usually stayover and i obviously will spend more time with gf. choosing friends over gf for that scenario doesn't equate to friends being more important than her; that doesn't also say that friends are less important than her. to me i guess friends and gf are of equal weightage. to be completely honest, i cannot share everything with my girlfriend. its a completely different story with a wife obviously.
im really blessed to have awesome friends who showered me with enough love that kept me going through my singlehood. somehow things changed over time, friends got busy during holidays. now im left alone, hoping for some love. NOT!! single life's not that bad, till i get a girlfriend, i shall enjoy my freedom. yay
Jesus is Love