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Kelvin
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Friday, February 13, 2009
its valentine's day and i get to save money cuz nobody wants me. hah. weiqi made me do this 9 pages survey for her research today and i was totally blown away by the last page. how attractive do u think u are and something about doing well in sports and friends being there for you that kinda things. i was really quite tempted to put strongly agree to everything but i decided to be a little bit humble. actually i refrained alot cuz i nearly increased the scale by 1. haha.
so yesterday i was quite tired but had stuff that was weighing me down so i gave qingnan a call at 10 plus but he only called me back at 12 when i was like asleep already. actually i wasn't really sleeping cuz i sat on my bed and doze off while reading my notes. so anyway, we continued to chat for a couple of hours until my phone died. one of the crucial question he asked me was y i wanted to have a girlfriend. i didn't know wad to say i mean is there even a right answer for this kinda questions. i never really ask my guy friends before so i wouldn't know whether my thinking was right or am i really that abnormal? i must admit that i am quite attention seeking, or perhaps quite is an understatement. i need alot of attention from people and when i dun get it, i will stone or i will just walk away to another place. one important factor that i look for in a girlfriend will be that she will have to give me quite abit of attention ba, but know when to walk away from me, not ignore me but gives me space. heh, actually if u ask me, i don't really know what i'm talking about at this point of time cuz i cannot tell u how much attention i need from u.
okie back to the topic. qingnan went on to say how come i find it hard to love a girl. i have the coolest parents who love me so much, i have friends whom i think they love me alot too. from them i have all the love that i need, i have all the attention i need too. need for girlfriend only comes when i am alone, when i see people becoming lovey dovey in front of me. i want that kinda attention too, i want that kinda love too. mayb im used to having everything my way, mayb im used to having everything i want. i am behaving like a spoilt brat but maybe i am spoilt. san said i never loved a girl before, i dunno how much of that is true but i do realised that my relationships never go past 3 mths before. its quite sad but its true. now i really got to wait for the right girl to come and hopefully God starts acting soon. come on God, jia you jia you!! i almost typed gimme gimme MORE.. haha.. pls no.. one is enough!! haha. i am no longer 3 in 1 hor.
so about that, my friend told me that i should change the way i speak cuz sometimes i ask questions that might lead people on unintentionally. things like "will u ever fall for me?" that kind of questions. depends on how i say it, sometimes i feel as though i am really very lousy, that no one will like me. at other occasions, i am just being cheeky. its quite easy to tell actually, from my tone and my eyes. dun laugh okie, eventho its small, it says alot. people who can read my eyes can read my mind.
alright, i should start changing to become the perfect guy for my future girlfriend. step 1,
i need to be sensitive. but i think i am quite alr so maybe i need to learn to think like a girl, as in try to put myself in their shoes and think. mayb thats y God made girls without sweaty feet.
step 2. need to know her love language. so far i am only good with 2 kinda love languages. i am bad with words of affirmation and especially acts of service. so i think i need to find one that does not have this 2 languages.
step 3. be involve in her social circle. get to know her friends more. okie err i dun even know y im saying all this now. haha
its past 12 now so happy valentine's day and happy friendship day to all my friends. love u guys ALOT!!
sometimes i dunno whether people can take this kinda speeches cuz for me its normal to say i love u to my friends in church but to my non church going friends, i have to refrain abit in case i scare them. even for pple from novo, i dunno if they will feel weird, like i think once i sms some peeps and put like muacks before i end off that sms. not much pple replied to say thanks and stuff. actually i think i demand too much from people, its like when i send an sms, i will want my friends to reply even if its like thanking them for doing something nice for me or simply just normal sms. dun really like to be the last to send out. it keeps me hanging, i will feel as though i sent something wrong so i will open up the sent msg to double check. oh well..
+++11:36 PM+++
Jesus is Love
its valentine's day and i get to save money cuz nobody wants me. hah. weiqi made me do this 9 pages survey for her research today and i was totally blown away by the last page. how attractive do u think u are and something about doing well in sports and friends being there for you that kinda things. i was really quite tempted to put strongly agree to everything but i decided to be a little bit humble. actually i refrained alot cuz i nearly increased the scale by 1. haha.
so yesterday i was quite tired but had stuff that was weighing me down so i gave qingnan a call at 10 plus but he only called me back at 12 when i was like asleep already. actually i wasn't really sleeping cuz i sat on my bed and doze off while reading my notes. so anyway, we continued to chat for a couple of hours until my phone died. one of the crucial question he asked me was y i wanted to have a girlfriend. i didn't know wad to say i mean is there even a right answer for this kinda questions. i never really ask my guy friends before so i wouldn't know whether my thinking was right or am i really that abnormal? i must admit that i am quite attention seeking, or perhaps quite is an understatement. i need alot of attention from people and when i dun get it, i will stone or i will just walk away to another place. one important factor that i look for in a girlfriend will be that she will have to give me quite abit of attention ba, but know when to walk away from me, not ignore me but gives me space. heh, actually if u ask me, i don't really know what i'm talking about at this point of time cuz i cannot tell u how much attention i need from u.
okie back to the topic. qingnan went on to say how come i find it hard to love a girl. i have the coolest parents who love me so much, i have friends whom i think they love me alot too. from them i have all the love that i need, i have all the attention i need too. need for girlfriend only comes when i am alone, when i see people becoming lovey dovey in front of me. i want that kinda attention too, i want that kinda love too. mayb im used to having everything my way, mayb im used to having everything i want. i am behaving like a spoilt brat but maybe i am spoilt. san said i never loved a girl before, i dunno how much of that is true but i do realised that my relationships never go past 3 mths before. its quite sad but its true. now i really got to wait for the right girl to come and hopefully God starts acting soon. come on God, jia you jia you!! i almost typed gimme gimme MORE.. haha.. pls no.. one is enough!! haha. i am no longer 3 in 1 hor.
so about that, my friend told me that i should change the way i speak cuz sometimes i ask questions that might lead people on unintentionally. things like "will u ever fall for me?" that kind of questions. depends on how i say it, sometimes i feel as though i am really very lousy, that no one will like me. at other occasions, i am just being cheeky. its quite easy to tell actually, from my tone and my eyes. dun laugh okie, eventho its small, it says alot. people who can read my eyes can read my mind.
alright, i should start changing to become the perfect guy for my future girlfriend. step 1,
i need to be sensitive. but i think i am quite alr so maybe i need to learn to think like a girl, as in try to put myself in their shoes and think. mayb thats y God made girls without sweaty feet.
step 2. need to know her love language. so far i am only good with 2 kinda love languages. i am bad with words of affirmation and especially acts of service. so i think i need to find one that does not have this 2 languages.
step 3. be involve in her social circle. get to know her friends more. okie err i dun even know y im saying all this now. haha
its past 12 now so happy valentine's day and happy friendship day to all my friends. love u guys ALOT!!
sometimes i dunno whether people can take this kinda speeches cuz for me its normal to say i love u to my friends in church but to my non church going friends, i have to refrain abit in case i scare them. even for pple from novo, i dunno if they will feel weird, like i think once i sms some peeps and put like muacks before i end off that sms. not much pple replied to say thanks and stuff. actually i think i demand too much from people, its like when i send an sms, i will want my friends to reply even if its like thanking them for doing something nice for me or simply just normal sms. dun really like to be the last to send out. it keeps me hanging, i will feel as though i sent something wrong so i will open up the sent msg to double check. oh well..
Jesus is Love